


Adult Wolves take the mall

by shuckingwolves



Series: Adult Wolves [1]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alive Laura Hale, Alternate Universe - Celebrity, Crack, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, Human Derek Hale, Human Hale Family, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-15
Updated: 2013-09-15
Packaged: 2017-12-26 16:42:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/968231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shuckingwolves/pseuds/shuckingwolves
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“This is Stiles. He’s my boyfriend.”</p><p>Stiles Stilinski had dreamt that Derek Hale would say that, using that low, husky voice of his, ever since he’d started watching Adult Wolves. Yet standing in front of Laura Hale, with the entire mall under the Hale family’s control, and Peter Hale locked in another room, was not exactly how he’d imagined it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The celebrity lifestyle

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, this is my second time writing fanfiction on this site so I hope you like it :) I had the idea and couldn't leave it alone!

Derek Hale was tired, grumpy, and above all impatient.

The fans outside the pane glass windows had been screaming for hours. They weren’t here for him, although Derek was a celebrity in his own right. They were here for Derek’s uncle, Peter. Derek sat in the chair, observing the screaming mass of people. Most of them were women; most of them were young, foolish, naïve. A few were men, a few were teenagers but all of them were here for Peter. Who, incidentally, wasn’t here for them. Derek glanced at the clock. Peter was late.

As if sensing Derek’s annoyance, Peter came sauntering through the doors. Peter Hale was one of those people who nobody could tame, he would always have a slight arrogance, he would always be happy about that. His ‘sexy’ smile looked more like an evil smirk to Derek, drawing Peter’s lips out into a gesture which was surely unnatural to his uncle. The cameras flashed frantically outside, the people screaming as they pressed themselves against the windows. To have such a squashed nose must have been painful. Derek merely raised his eyebrows.

“Look at them! They love me!”

“I can’t see why.” Derek muttered.

Peter threw a hand into the air in dismissal. His eyes still soaked in the fans, like a sponge filling hungrily with water. When he seemed satisfied with the amount of adoration, he called out to his personal body guards.

“Ok, I’m ready. Let’s start signing.”

The body guards nodded silently, moving forward to open the doors. It was a good job there were so many guards, so much muscle, because the fans were going insane. They filled into the room, some of them weeping, and were led into a side area. This was the queue area; it had those flimsy rails you saw in airports and artificial lighting. Peter sat on a table, around the corner, a board blocking the view. He reached for his pen, smirking again, as the first fan drew near to the table.

“I’m such a big fan! It’s so great to meet you! Your character on the show is just…wow…all the poor things he’s been through!”

“Yeah, I often empathise with him. I face new challenges everyday but still smile through.”

At this, Peter smirked again, obviously counting that as a charming smile. He asked who to sign the photo to and the girl looked positively petrified with glee. Derek stood to the side, watching with loathing. He and Peter were both part of a TV drama about supernatural creatures, mostly werewolves, yet Peter got all the attention. Derek skulked around, signing for the few fans who noticed and wanted to meet him, but decided to head elsewhere after ten minutes.

The mall was hosting the signing event in one of the DVD shops which had the new DVD for _Adult Wolves_. Derek had always disliked the title of the show but he knew the show itself far exceeded expectations. He walked out of the shop, his hands in his pockets, his frown in place, and headed for the nearest cafeteria. He ordered a sandwich, earning a ‘are you Derek Hale?’ from the customers near him and the cashier, and ate in broody silence. It was at that time a young teenager, a few years younger than Derek, came crashing down a few seats away from him. The teenager was positively ecstatic with energy, his whole face lit up with amusement, his eyes smiling.

“Scott, you will never guess!”

“You met him, haha, Stiles.” The teenager’s friend rolled his eyes.

“Exactly _I met him_. Peter freaking Hale.”

Scott, who was evidently Stiles’s friend, seemed a little taken aback at this. Scott’s expression was dubious, his eyes narrowed.

“Look, an autograph and everything.” Stiles triumphantly slammed a picture onto the table.

Derek was growing more infuriated as Scott grew more impressed. Scott took the picture, staring at the signature with disbelief. He looked up, beaming, his excitement tangible.

“Did he say anything to you?”

“He said my moles were cute.”

Stiles seemed a little confused by this, blushing anyway. Perhaps, his face was naturally flushed with the adrenaline of having met his idol. Derek’s anger purred inside him, the injustice stinging his nerves, grating on the last one. He walked over to their table, slammed his hands on it, demanding attention. The stunned teenagers glanced up. Stiles’s mouth dropped, he gaped there, trying to move it and failing. He reminded Derek of an endearing or annoying goldfish. Derek couldn’t decide which yet.

“You shouldn’t look up to him. He’s a selfish, smug, arrogant jerk.”

Stiles gawped. Scott seemed to come desperately to the rescue, his brown eyes apologetic and damn that actually worked. Derek’s expression became slightly disgruntled instead of furious.

“We don’t really look up to _him_.” Scott said, the words spoken pointedly.

Derek frowned again, leaving before he had chance to punch the kid for ridiculing him. Nobody liked him over Peter. Nobody. This was why Derek had a plan in place. He was going to show Peter who was in charge. This was a game of power and Derek was not going to lose. He walked over to the guards, muttering something and flashing a few notes. Their eyes lit up with greed. After all, Derek was part of the same family; they would still be doing their job. A little differently but if that fact made their consciences feel better than so be it.  
*

The Hale family are notorious for their drama, yet somehow Stiles never thought that he would be caught in the middle of it. Years ago, Talia Hale and her not-so-famous husband had an argument over their son, Derek. The news articles had reported that the husband had forgotten to book a baby sitter, leaving Derek alone for forty minutes. It had ended so badly that said husband’s car had caught fire. Then, there was that time Laura Hale had announced she wasn’t going to University anymore but joining the family business of acting. She had been seen as one of the most academically gifted of the Hales. Her parents hadn’t been pleased but she’d run away from home, living with friends a few towns over whilst being reported missing. Of course, Peter Hale always flaunted ridiculous style whenever he could, arriving in helicopters and shades. Cora Hale had started her own fighting business, training up young men and women. Peter had disapproved, saying she had a natural gift with acting, often tweeting horrible things about her business. In retaliation, Cora had trashed one of his precious Lamborghinis with a hammer. The picture of glass, wrecked leather and a spray can message on the hood of the car saying ‘tweet that you asshole’ had made the front page of every magazine. Derek Hale was the only one Stiles really admired. Derek was attractive and smart. Derek Hale also played a major role in Adult Wolves, the Hale family preference to star in, which Stiles never failed to miss. All of these things led up to the reason why Stiles had missed his chance to speak when the famous, brooding star had casually stormed to their table.

“Dude, did you see that? I can’t believe I just stared at him!” Stiles groaned.

“He was pretty good-looking.” Scott pointed out.

All the Hale family were good-looking. It was a well-known fact. There must be something in those genes. Stiles dismissed the thought, staring after the direction Derek had walked.

“I can’t believe I missed him at the signing! He was just hanging out here!”

“Yeah, that’s a bit weird.” Scott nodded along.

“I’m going to find him. I’m going to do it. I’ll just walk right up to him and say…”

Stiles trailed off, licking his lips nervously. What would he say? He had no idea what to say! Scott laughed good humouredly, his lips quirking into a smile, his brown eyes shining with amusement.

“That you always say he’s the hottest person on the show, every week, without fail.”

“He’s the hottest person ever.” Stiles emphasized.

Stiles leant forward, his eyes dead serious, his expression of determination one Scott dreaded. Now he was in for a fan rant.

“Did you see those muscles? Rippling, Scott, _rippling_. I haven’t seen any muscle in our school ripple like that.”

“We have an entire lacrosse team.” Scott protested, his head in his hands.

“Who all sweat and beat me at lacrosse. I’m definitely going to look for him.”

With that, Stiles pushed his seat from the table, stood to his feet, and walked off in the direction which Derek had left. His mind was dead set upon what he had to do. Find Derek. Say hi. Remain calm. Talk. Maybe hug. Life equals over. Waving goodbye to Scott, with an optimistic grin on his face, he didn’t realise it may be over for far more tedious reasons.  
*

Derek stood on the side-lines, watching Peter bask in the flashes of each camera, winking at fans, signing away, boasting that he needed a new pen. He glanced over at Derek.

“Ah, brilliant. Yours is full of ink. Pass it here, dear nephew.”

Derek chucked it across the room, aiming for Peter’s eye, but Peter caught it surprisingly well. The smirk never left his lips. Derek discreetly took out his mobile. Peter was busy with the fans but that didn’t mean Derek wasn’t nervous about this. He had always prided himself on being the best one in the family when it came to the no stunts rule. Everybody had broken it apart from him. Now, he was giving in to the family ways. He dialled Cora’s number.

“I’m a little busy now, Derek.” Cora panted, yelling off to the side.

She was in a lesson, teaching her pupils whilst also punching them into pieces. They must be newbies. Derek bit back his annoyance; he would need to if he wanted help on this. Cora was the master at revenge.

“I need your help.”

On the other end of the phone, Cora paused, tucking a strand of loose hair behind her ear. Her students carried on punching, kicking and jabbing in the background but she was focusing on Derek’s angry tone. Something had obviously gone wrong at the signing. Peter. She climbed down from the boxing ring, ducking the tough ropes, fiddling at the hem of her tank top. On one hand, any chance to get one over on Peter had to be counted as a good thing. On the other, Derek was extremely new to this whole personal vendetta thing. She sighed. The opportunity was too great to miss.

“I’m listening.”

Derek glanced at Peter, who was gazing at him with a quizzical expression. Derek ignored the look, turning his back on his uncle, leaving the man to his fans. His voice was low as  
he spoke the idea aloud.

“We’re going to take control of the mall.”

On the other end of the phone, Cora laughed.

“Oh, this is going to be good.” She predicted.


	2. Family fights

Derek met Cora and Laura outside in the mall car park. Laura slammed the door to her sleek, silver car. Her flashing grin made Derek’s mind involuntarily go to the word evil. Then again, that wasn’t exactly new news. Laura was the one who mercilessly teased the entire family, demanding when she wanted her way and ruthless when it came to ‘pranks’ like the one they were about to pull. Cora simply shrugged on a jacket over her tank top, smiling at Derek in greeting. Her expression was slightly less calculating than Laura’s.

“I love it when we break the rules.” Laura said, smiling knowingly at Derek.

Derek shifted uncomfortably. He never broke the family rules. Laura knew that. She was relishing this. Her blue eyes laughed at his darker ones. Cora merely smiled a little, as if she secretly liked Derek joining the ‘dark side’ too.

“Shut up.” Derek snapped.

“Do you want our help or not?” Cora asked bluntly.

Derek was faced with a moment of indecision. Only a moment, then it was gone, fading from existence as quick as it started. He gestured towards the shop where Peter was busy signing away.

“Lead the way.”  
*

Stiles skidded around the corner; he had slightly over judged his momentum. It didn’t matter; he flailed his arms a little before running again. He had to find Derek before the signing was over. He almost ran straight into her, stumbling to a halt just before.

“I’m sorry, sorry, I didn’t see you there…” He trailed off, realising he was talking to Cora Hale.

She raised an eyebrow, her arms crossed over her chest, her dark eyes demanding. Stiles had a brief moment to think that her eyes were darker than Derek’s, that Derek had a slightly pale tinge to his brown eyes. Then, she was angry.

“How about you try not to run into people?” She suggested pointedly.

“Wait, you’re Cora Hale.” Stiles said, kicking himself for how stupid that sounded.

She didn’t bother replying but carried on walking. A few paces away from him, she turned around and glared.

“Try to keep up, moron.”

Stiles startled, realising that she meant he should follow her. Why would a celebrity want him to follow them? It was insane, celebrities didn’t just do that. Did they? Stiles squinted at her, eyes narrowed in suspicion.

“Why would you want me to tag along with you?” He asked slowly, trying not to be offensive.

However, Cora was not trying for that approach. She rolled her eyes at his stupidity. After a few moments of the teenage boy blinking at her, she grabbed his wrist and pulled him along. This was already not going as planned. Although, for Derek’s first time at this she was impressed.

“I don’t want you to but seeing as you’re the only person _in this entire mall_ who was dumb enough not to get out when guards filed in then you need to come with me.”

Stiles spluttered at that, words failing him for once. Cora smiled a little, her eyes curious.

“Why didn’t you notice?”

Stiles closed his mouth abruptly. There was no way he was telling her it was because he’d been searching for her super-hot, super-angry brother. He’d wanted to apologise to Derek, to say something, and now look what had happened. He was suddenly wishing he was back with Scott in the cafeteria, listening to his friend and allowing himself to be dissuaded from doing something for once.

Cora shrugged, as if the answer didn’t much matter to her. He supposed it didn’t. She carried on walking, pulling him along, until they reached the escalators. They stood in tense silence, the escalator carrying them down a level, before stepping off and continuing the brisk walk. Stiles wondered if Cora usually walked this fast, if she was aware that normal people called it speed walking. Finally, she stopped outside the DVD shop, scowling at a poster of Peter which was plastered on the window. She sighed before dragging Stiles inside with her. Stiles realised as soon as they stepped foot in the shop that this family was crazy.

There was a reason the entire mall was silent, empty, like Cora had said. This was it. Derek Hale stood in the middle of the room, gazing at Peter Hale with barely concealed contempt. The DVD shop was empty except for them and around twenty five guards. Each guard had a fierce frown and bulging muscles which stretched their tops. Stiles swallowed nervously.

Peter Hale’s smirk had vanished. His blue eyes flashed dangerously, his breath seething into the room, emitting a hostility which Stiles hadn’t thought was even possible. Every breath the man took was filled with anger. His chiselled good looks seemed to vanish along with his good temper.

“WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING!” He shouted.

It wasn’t a question. Derek didn’t even flinch, only batted an eyelid and glanced away with boredom. He still hadn’t noticed Cora and Stiles yet. Nobody had. All the attention was on Peter.

“YOUR MOTHER WILL HEAR ABOUT THIS!”

Peter’s face was turning positively red. Derek merely laughed.

“I think they might like this actually.” Derek reflected, his voice even.

Stiles wanted to laugh, biting on his lip to restrain himself. Next to him, Cora’s lips were twitching. Her eyes flickered back to Peter and Stiles followed suit. The man, who Derek knew to be so smug, was trembling with rage.

“THIS WAS MY DAY! _MINE!_ YOU CAN’T STEAL THAT FROM ME! _I’M_ THE STAR!”

That seemed to spark a reaction for Derek. He strode closer to Peter, his movements were deadly quiet, his hands clenched into fists, the knuckles turning white with strain. For one scary moment, Stiles seriously thought Derek was going to punch Peter into a pulp.

“Nobody likes you.” Derek dead-panned.

“You could have just said it to my face. Instead of this! You really don’t want to play this game, Derek. The cat always catches the mouse.”

Silently, Derek regarded him for a moment. He shook his head, reaching a decision.

“We. Don’t. Like. You.” He said, putting empathise on each word.

“Fair enough.” Peter growled, the tone contradicting his words.

Stiles was mentally storing away each part of this conversation, each movement which was made. He was so telling Scott all this, maybe it would even impress Lydia Martin.  
Nobody in Beacon Hills ever got this close to celebrities. Derek signalled to the guards and they grabbed Peter, pulling him through a door to the side, his face managed to crane over their large shoulders.

“THE CAT CATCHES THE MOUSE, DEREK. ALWAYS.”

Stiles shook his head. Fame had made the man crazed. It was a wonder the public had never noticed, that he hadn’t noticed before. The guards pushed Peter in the room, leaving one guard with him, before locking the door.

Once the family fight was over with, the guards milled about the place, hissing into walkie-talkies. Derek faced the other way, mulling over Peter’s words in his mind. Cora left Stiles, walking deeper into the room. She glanced around, supposedly for something to do. Stiles realised what these people were doing. They were waiting. The guards shifting uncomfortably, Derek tapping his finger on his thigh impatiently, Cora deciding to make use of time by talking to the guards. That was when it happened. That was when Derek turned around. His eyes showed a little surprise at the sight of Stiles, before his usual mask was back in place. Cora noticed the scene unfolding.

“He ran into me. Literally.” She explained, walking towards some guards.

“What are you doing here?” Derek asked, his voice neither displeased nor happy.

Stiles’s heart was hammering. How could he make such a fool of himself, twice, in front of Derek Hale? It was mortifying. He felt his cheeks flushing but was helpless to stop it. Stiles looked for Cora for help but she was busy discussing something with the guards. He licked his lips nervously before answering.

“I, um, I just wanted to apologise.”

“Apologise?”

Did he not even remember him? Stiles’s heart sunk a little in dismay but then Derek was speaking again.

“For my anger? That’s not your fault.” The words were blunt, open.

Stiles’s eyes widened in shock, this was not what he expected from the man who’d just taken over the mall because he’d fallen out with his uncle. It was bizarre, serial, insane. Derek wasn’t even thinking over their conversation. He was calling out to Cora.

“She’s not going to like this.”

Cora nodded, extracting herself from a previous conversation and moving towards them. She eyed Stiles warily, as if he could possibly mess up things even more.

“You brought in the right person if you want to take Peter down but the right person if you want there to be civility? No way.”

Derek frowned at this, his brow furrowing deeper. Stiles couldn’t help it. He had to ask. The questions were burning inside his mind, wriggling inside him, crawling through his throat, blurting out of his mouth.

“What do you mean? What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong is that she’ll lock you in there.” Cora jabbed a thumb over her shoulder.

“In there? _With him?_ No thanks.” Stiles hastened to say.

“She won’t buy any crap story, Derek. You know that.” Cora warned.

Derek nodded, his expression of concentration looked almost painful to Stiles. Derek knew that Laura was as merciless as Peter when it came to these ‘games’ of theirs. She would realise that letting Stiles out of the mall meant paparazzi all over him, asking questions into another wild family prank. Their parents would kill them. Cora was right. Laura would most likely lock Stiles in with Peter. Derek wasn’t comfortable with that. Despite the fact he’d locked his own uncle inside, this was a kid who had come to apologise to him for something which had been Derek’s fault anyway. Derek shook his head, growling in annoyance.

“I’ve got an idea.” Cora said, her smile widening, her eyes uncertain.

“What?” Derek barked.

“You’re not going to like it.”


	3. First meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Derek and Stiles try to fool Laura

Laura Hale swanned in, her dark hair flying past her shoulders, her hips swaying left and right, her heels clicking on the flooring. She stopped, sighing as she sat down in the leather, spinning chair, relaxing comfortably. She glanced up, watching Derek as Cora taught him a new attack manoeuvre.

“Some kid didn’t get home apparently. I’ve sent a look out for him.”

Derek almost froze but nodded instead, gathering his pretence and wrapping it around himself. It was worrying how easy that was to do. Laura Hale swung round on the chair, stopping as her eyes caught sight of Stiles. Stiles stood slightly out of the attention, holding onto the window sill for strength. He was actually petrified of this woman, she was a complete she wolf. Laura Hale tilted her head, considering him.

“And who are you?”

“Stiles. I’m…I mean…I’m with…um…Derek will tell you.”

Laura nodded coolly, her eyes never leaving Stiles as she called out to Derek.

“Derek? Who is this?”

Derek turned, his body tense as a coil of wire. He walked towards them, Cora trailing quietly behind. Even the body guards were sending him sympathetic looks. He didn’t need that. He could fool his sister. At least, he hoped he could. Derek walked over to Stiles, sliding a hand around Stiles’s waist.

“This is Stiles. He’s my boyfriend.”

Stiles Stilinski had dreamt that Derek Hale would say that, using that low, husky voice of his, ever since he’d started watching _Adult Wolves_. Yet standing in front of Laura Hale, with the entire mall under the Hale family’s control, and Peter Hale locked in another room, was not exactly how he’d imagined it.

“Stiles is his name? I don’t believe you. That’s the worst cover story ever. Out with it, Derek.”

“If you knew my real name you’d say that was a cover story.” Stiles said defensively.

Laura’s eyes widened, she hadn’t expected that sort of tone to come from a complete stranger. Her eyes flickered between him and Derek, drinking it all in, running through the possibilities and arriving at the one which was given to her. Her blue eyes turned from calculating to positively gleaming with excitement.

“O.M.G. This is great, Derek! Wow, I didn’t expect this!” She clapped her hands together.

For years, Laura Hale had been trying hopelessly to get her brother to engage in romantics, offering a dozen blind dates, giving his number out to all her fellow celebrities. It had all been to Derek’s annoyance. Yet, the fact he could find somebody on his own was to her surprise. She rushed over to Stiles, pulling him into a massive hug. Stiles froze, struck by the idea that she believed he was good enough to go out with Derek freaking Hale. Then, the realisation that Laura Hale was hugging him caught up with him, her perfume dancing around his nostrils, and he wondered how he’d ever thought this would be a bad idea. She pulled back, beaming at him and Derek.

“I’m so, so, sorry, Stiles. I didn’t realise. I’m just so glad you two are together.”

Derek nodded stiffly in agreement of this, his hand felt rigid against Stiles’s waist. Stiles hadn’t realised before now that Derek was so emotionally uncomfortable.

“So?” Laura asked, raising her eyebrows and pushing her head forward slightly.

She wanted an answer. To what? Derek glanced at him in alarm, equally confused. Laura planted her hand on Stiles’s arm, like a friend sharing a laugh.

“How did you meet, silly.”

Derek looked even more alarmed at the prospect of speaking than Stiles would have thought was possible. Stiles cleared his throat, Laura sat down again. She rested her head on her hands, propped up on elbows, gazing at them expectantly. This was different from her wary looks before, this was interested and happy. Stiles was completely amused by it. Cora seemed to be as well. She stood a little away from them, leaning against the wall, smiling.

“Um…well, Derek totally creeped out on me.”

Laura nodded understandingly. Next to him, Stiles could feel Derek bristling with anger. He tried not to laugh as he continued the story of their oh-so-romantic first meeting.

“He saw me in a cafeteria and just kept looking at me, you know?”

“He does do that sometimes.” Cora inputted, her smile growing.

Laura was lapping it all up like a sophisticated, expectant cat presented with a saucer of milk. Derek, however, was not enjoying this as much.

“Then I realise it was _Derek Hale_. So, I told myself to just act cool.”

“Which, he didn’t. He was a total mess. Flailing and gawping.” Derek interrupted.

He raised an eyebrow at Stiles; Stiles met the silent question with a set of hard determination in his eyes. Derek wanted to play it like that did he? Well, ok then.

“Anyways, so Derek finally came up to me. He was quite shy, bless him. He mumbled something-”

“-I wasn’t shy. I don’t mumble.” Derek gritted out.

Laura shook her head at him. “Oh, yes you do. You’ve got that dark, brooding thing going on.”

“Exactly! So I asked him to repeat it. He just wrote his number on my hand and walked off. Which I wasn’t having because it was  _Derek Hale_.”

Laura was shaking her head in disappointment at Derek, but her eyes held a superior knowledge like she knew all along that was why he’d always failed at dating. Derek was fuming. He was almost as furious as Peter had been forty minutes earlier. Stiles would pay for this.

“So, then Stiles just stands up and shouts at me, in front of the entire cafeteria, saying ‘I’m a virgin so you can’t just mess with me like that’.”

Stiles gaped at him with a mixture of horror and annoyance. Cora laughed, the sound echoing of the walls. It taunted Stiles. That was not how this was going to end, oh no.

“Anyway, then everyone was watching and Derek just walks up to me, all mucho like, and says ‘I’m not messing. I’m in love.’”

“I did _not_ say that.”

“Yes, yes you did. You said it loud and proud, Der-bear.”

If glares could actually repel people, Stiles would have been on the other side of the world, then on another planet and then he would have landed in the furthest corners of the universe. Derek Hale was much more prone to rage than Stiles had anticipated.

“So, what happened next?” Laura practically squealed.

“Next, Stiles stumbled backwards in shock-“

“And I knocked into somebody’s meal. It went flying into Derek. Really embarrassing for him.”

Cora, much to Laura’s confusion, was laughing uncontrollably at this, clutching her side, her mouth wide with mirth. Laura gestured for one of them to continue the story.

“So then I threw some food back-“

“Which totally started a food war, they were threatening to _sue_.”

Derek’s eyes were filled with amusement for once, enjoying this game. He had lost all thought to be serious, it simply didn’t occur to him. Laura was enjoying the story, drinking it all in, Cora certainly was, Stiles was encouraging it and Peter, well nobody liked Peter. It didn’t matter that their uncle was missing out.

“Stiles had pasta all over his hair, falling down his face. Like there.”

Derek gestured to the top of Stiles’s head, following the movement of the pretentious strand of pasta. Stiles was grinning, imagining the scene himself. Derek didn’t realise his  
finger had moved down to Stiles’s lips before it was too late. Stupid. That was so stupid. He was close to Stiles now, their faces inches apart. He went to pull back but then Laura  
cat-called to them.

“KISS!”

Derek closed his eyes. He had dreaded her saying that. Not because Stiles wasn’t attractive but because that was too much to ask of somebody whose day Derek has most likely already ruined. Stiles simply leant forward, needing no other prompting. He knew if they didn’t do this then Laura would call their bluff, it would all be over and Stiles would be locked in a room for who knows how many hours. Besides, it wasn’t like kissing Derek Hale was a tasking thing to do. In fact, it might just make his day.

The kiss was hesitant at first, their lips slow to touch. That was ok; being shy of kissing in public would be seen as normal to Laura. Then, it deepened, their lips moving together, slow and deliberate. Derek’s hand crept up Stiles’s back, pulling Stiles closer before realising what he was doing, his other hand tangling in Stiles’s hair. The smell of Derek, of aftershave and laundry detergent, snuck into Stile’s nostrils. Their kiss became slightly faster, desperate to cling onto whatever wonderful thing they had stumbled upon by mistake.

“Ok, ok, cut the romance before I puke!” Laura laughed.

They obeyed, stepping away from each other. The next ten minutes, Laura spent talking about how the rest of the mall was clear, the Porsche which Peter had arrived in had been seen to, how step two should get under way now. Derek and Stiles missed most of it. They kept glancing at each other, sneaking furtive looks, then glancing down at the floor. Stiles felt the familiar flush creep into his cheeks; he knew Derek was looking at him back.


	4. The second stage

The second stage of the plan turned out to be taking Peter for a little walk.

Laura led the way, the others walking behind. Peter was escorted with them by a handful of guards. As Derek walked along, he was aware that there was noise coming from outside. Shouting.

“Laura, how long does it take for this to get out?”

Laura turned her head back, to look at him better.

“Not long. But long enough. Come on.”

They reached the main walkway for the shops, a big marble flooring, open space. Posters were everywhere, guards taping them to the walls. They each had a picture of Peter on, and not a flattering one. He was smiling in the photo but somebody had scribbled a gigantic moustache and goatee onto his face. Laura turned to a guard and asked for more to be photocopied from the book store. The guard agreed, walking off soon after. Peter stood, appalled, gaping at the scene before him. He walked towards one of the posters, tore it from the wall and waved it in Derek’s face.

“You’re the one with the stupid beard!” He roared.

Derek merely raised his eyebrows.

“Mind your tone, or we’ll just lock you back up.” Laura chided.

Peter pursed his lips, his eyes glinting with fury, dropping the poster and falling back into line. They walked upstairs, through another door and out into the car park. More guards were here, standing threateningly. They all smiled as Laura waved at them. She lead them over to a Porsche, its silver paintwork ripped to shreds, it windows smashed, the headlights gone.

“Every time, Cora!” Peter shouted.

“You’d smash it anyway by your lousy driving.” She shrugged.

Laura was smiling with glee, Derek was chuckling, even Stiles couldn’t help grinning. Laura led the way again, walking back into the mall. It was time for the final stunt. They stopped in the middle of the open space, where they had been a few minutes ago. Laura turned, smiling at them, her arms wide.

“And now, ladies and gentlemen, the final act for this hour.” She said.

Peter couldn’t keep himself from groaning with annoyance. Typical. Smashing his car and ruining his image wasn’t bad enough. Laura turned to face Peter, much like a lawyer interrogating the guilty at a trial.

“Peter, please watch this video.”

The video consisted of Peter, drunk, winking at everybody within a mile, yelling about how fame made him prettier than everybody else, stumbling into his brand new sixty-inch television and therefore smashing it into the wall.

“Hmm. Oh, a link to facebook. How helpful.” Laura commented whilst scrolling afterwards.

Peter turned rigid. “You wouldn’t dare.” His tone was ice cold.

“Oh, I’d dare.” Derek said, accepting the mobile Laura was offering.

He pressed post. The outraged scream from his uncle made up for the hours of sitting on the side-lines, watching him bask in the glory, listening as Peter had gloated. Luckily, Derek hadn’t made his image as much of a deal to himself as Peter had. If Peter retaliated with a drunken video of Derek, Derek wouldn’t mind as much. He might be grumpy but wouldn’t scream.

Afterwards, the guards escorted Peter back to the DVD shop. Laura, Derek, Cora and Stiles headed towards one of the closed cafes and helped themselves to refreshments. On the way there, Stiles drew Derek to the side.

“This is crazy! You’re all mad! What sort of people take control of a mall? Who even does that? Smashing cars, plastering up moustache pictures…what the hell is wrong with you?”

Derek rolled his eyes.

“Relax, Stiles. It’s just a prank. We do it all the time.”

“I know you do but me? Not so much, buddy. I do things like normal people. Normal people don’t do this.”

Stiles gestured around them at the mall in general to emphasise his point.

“It’ll be over in an hour or so. You won’t have to see us again.”

Derek almost sounded sad. Stiles pushed away the thought, it was ridiculous. Derek Hale was a celebrity. A really huge celebrity who had plenty of other options than Stiles. He was too ordinary to even be considered an option. As Derek ate with the others, laughing at all Stiles’s jokes and the frantic hand gestures and movements which accompanied them, he thought completely the opposite.

Then, the TV which had simply been background noise before struck the company with its words.

“Local authorities have reported the infiltration of a mall in Beacon Hills. The famous Hale family are behind the act, which is none other than another ridiculous prank. It has even been reported that a Stiles Stilinski has been kidnapped as part of the ‘joke’.”

Laura, Cora, Derek and Stiles stared at each other with open mouths and wide eyes. For a few minutes, the silence was impenetrable. Then, it broke.


	5. The final stage

“You’re joking me.” Laura said.

“Who leaked it?” Cora asked.

“We're kidnappers?” Derek raised his eyebrows.

Stiles simply laughed, pointing at the news report as the woman on screen continued to detail the events.

“This new video footage has been leaked of Peter Hale. We assume the mall was taken over a family dispute with him.”

The video was shown, Peter slurring his words, making a complete joke of himself. Stiles had a stitch in his side, he couldn’t stop laughing. This, despite all his previous doubts, was actually a hilarious prank.

“Why don’t they know you’re together?” Laura asked, narrowing her eyes at Stiles.

Stiles swallowed nervously, trying desperately to form some words with his lips. This wasn’t usually a problem but being interrogated by a ruthless celebrity had the effect of stealing his words from his mouth. Luckily, Derek wasn’t as scared of his sister.

“I’m not going to tell the press about my relationships. Unlike some people.”

Laura waggled a chip in Derek’s face, completely forgetting her past suspicions in her annoyance at Derek’s words.

“That’s not technically true. I just wanted to express how horrible my ex was. Bit of payback.”

Stiles was becoming less and less unsure about this plan with every word which flew out of Laura Hale’s mouth. His phone vibrated in his pocket. Ten miscalls from his dad, ten from Scott. Whoops.

“Can we talk about the fact we’re now kidnappers?” Cora snapped at her bickering siblings.

“Relax. I’ll just phone my dad. Tell him it’s a misunderstanding.”

Laura scoffed at him, even Derek stared at him as though he’d gone absolutely, a hundred percent mad. Cora merely sat backwards in her chair, huffing out a sigh, undoubtedly wondering why she even bothered pulling Stiles along with her a few hours ago. Stiles stuck his chin out indignantly, raising an eyebrow in defence.

“He’s the Sheriff.”

“Oh my god. We’ve supposedly kidnapped the sheriff’s son?” Laura screeched.

Laura shifted in her seat, all the better to glare at Derek. Glaring seemed to be a family trait, which Stiles found funny to observe. They were all simply a bunch of grumpy celebrities.

“We are so not helping your plans anymore, Derek.” Laura snapped.

“I didn’t know he was the Sheriff’s son.” Derek gritted out between his teeth.

Laura rolled her eyes so vigorously Stiles was worried they’d roll into the back of her head and never appear again. Cora was looking worried, glancing at Derek in warning.

“What do you mean you didn’t know he was the Sheriff’s son? He’s your boyfriend!”

“Uh, we’re taking it slow. Grumpymuffin over here doesn’t like to rush things.” Stiles interrupted.

Derek fumed at him, his hands clenched into fists and his breath seething, for the nickname. Stiles shrugged. Laura giggled at this piece of information, a blatant change from before, changing to the teasing sister she could be. She nudged Derek in the ribs.

“You want to make sure this love is real?” She said.

Her voice was patronizing, she pronounced the ‘r’ and a ‘w’. Abruptly, Derek stood to his feet. He’d had enough of this. He was fed up with being teased for a relationship which he wasn’t even in.

“Are we going to start the last stage or not?” He grumbled.

Laura stood to her feet as well, matching his stance like it was a challenge to accept or decline. Her eyes were gleaming dangerously again.

“Oh, we will.” She promised.

With that, she strode out of the café, her heels clicking on the marble flooring. Her dark hair swished from side to side as they stared after her. Derek sighed with resignation, following soon after. Cora looked at Stiles.

“Come on.” She said, her voice kinder than before.

“You’re not going to kill Peter are you?” Stiles asked, his tone doubtful.

“Of course not, don’t be stupid. It’s just a bit of revenge.”

Stiles nodded, standing to his feet and allowing her to grab his wrist again, pulling him along. Somehow, her words didn’t hold much comfort for him.  
*

They stopped inside an electric shop. Derek froze. Laura sighed, pushing past him in annoyance.

“Really, Derek. What’s the proble-”

The problem then became very evident. People were cramming into the back entrance of the shop, yelling at the sight of them. Laura cursed under her breath. She turned back towards them, pushing at Cora’s back.

“Go, come on.” To the side, she yelled out. “GUARDS!”

Stiles stumbled to follow but his eyes caught sight of a face he couldn’t leave. Derek was calling to him, his voice growling with impatience. Stiles felt the man’s hand on his shoulder but he ignored it. Scott ran over to him, his brown eyes sympathetic.

“Stiles! Thank God! Are you ok?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. What are you doing here?” Stiles exclaimed.

“Stiles, we need to leave. Now.”

Scott’s stance became indignant, his brown puppy dog eyes protective. Angry even. Stiles had never seen that before, not even when Jackson had sat behind them in chemistry class.

“You can stay out of this; you can’t just kidnap my best friend!”

Derek looked affronted. He opened his mouth, fury sparking in his eyes, but Stiles drew Scott aside. There was no way the two were arguing now, when everybody was breaking through the guards.

“It’s fine, Scott. Honestly. They didn’t kidnap me.”

“Wait, you _like_ these jerks?”

“They’re not jerks.”

“Stiles, I know they’ve been our idols for around forever but you have to leave with me. This is wrong. They can’t take over a mall and keep you here too.”

Stiles was about to protest again about how it wasn’t kidnapping when Derek grabbed his wrist and pulled him out of the room. They slammed the shop door behind them . Cora panted, leaning her back against it. Laura was already doing a miniature run in her heels.

“Come on, we don’t have much time!”

They glanced at each other, hearing the yelling behind the door. They stacked a few carts nearby, which held nothing but pic’n’mix, against the door before following.  
*

Derek managed to find another electric shop, holding the shaver in one hand. They rushed down the mall, hearing the public and police break through the door at last. Laura’s hair whipped around her as she turned to look. Derek sprinted past her, grabbing her arm and pulling her along.

“WE HAVE TO FINISH THIS!” He yelled at her.

She nodded seriously, running alongside him. Stiles didn’t even know why he was still running, he was starting to have a stitch. Yet, on he went following these mad people into an adventure which was purely based off their need for revenge. Talk about family problems. They skidded to a halt, Cora’s hand flying out to find the door handle. She pushed it open and they all piled through. Derek glanced at the guards in the DVD shop.

“Hold them back!” He ordered them.

They complied, nodding quickly and stationing themselves at different points in the room, all facing the door expectantly.

“Derek, there’s no time!” Cora yelled.

Derek ignored this, running past her as Laura hastily undid the lock. She opened the door; they all scrambled in, Stiles slamming the door closed behind them. Peter sat in the manager’s chair, because this was a manager’s office, a little shocked to see them all so breathless. He opened his mouth to speak a sassy remark but closed it again, with a look of absolute horror, when he caught sight of the razor in Derek’s hand.

“You can’t be serious?” He asked.

He moved to stand up but Derek was already there, pushing him back down, tilting his head and shaving off his right eyebrow. Peter howled with misery. His looks were everything, the fans and producers loved him for his looks. He thrived on the knowledge that he looked immaculate, stunning, twenty-four seven.

“Get off!” He shouted.

Derek ignored this, reaching for his hair with the razor. Stiles couldn’t help but laugh at the ridiculous image of Peter Hale without an eyebrow. Beside him, Laura was grinning and Cora’s shoulders were shaking with laughter.

The door burst open and the tension picked up. It was a guard.

“Sir, they’re going to break through in a minute.”

Derek sighed, leaving Peter with one shaved patch of hair and one demolished eyebrow. Peter looked bizarre. When he raised his shaved eyebrow, it was even worse. Derek turned towards Stiles, about to comment to him, but his breath caught in his throat. Stiles was laughing, the skin around his eyes crinkling with the effort, his eyes shining with amusement. Derek did the only thing he could think to do which would make this moment even better. He didn’t care about the timing. All he cared about was Stiles because Stiles was the one who had come to apologise, who had played along with this entire mess, who had even pretended to be his boyfriend. Now, here they were, with Derek realising, in that split second, that he really did want Stiles as his boyfriend. He didn’t want to pretend. This was real for him. He wanted to make Stiles laugh like that every day, fill every moment with happiness. Derek had forgotten, lost in his usual grumpy demeanour, just how good being that happy had felt.

So, he closed the gap. His lips pressed against Stiles’s. Stiles seemed surprised, his eyes widening, his mouth frozen. Then, miraculously, he was kissing Derek back. It wasn’t fake. Derek could feel every ounce of emotion as the kiss deepened, Stiles pressing his body closer so that they were cradling each other in that moment. It felt so wonderful.

It shattered.


	6. My boyfriend, Derek Hale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and kudos :) Hope you enjoy the ending

The Sheriff stood in the doorway, police next to him, utterly astounded. Stiles’s lips lingered a second longer, earning a small smile from Derek. The smile tugged on the corners of Derek’s lips, Stiles hated to turn away from it. He did. His dad was waiting, his arms crossed, wearing an unimpressed expression. Stiles swung his arms a little, trying not to look at his dad.

“Well, dad, um, there’s a conversation we need to-”

“You’re not gay.” The Sheriff interrupted.

Stiles looked so appalled that Cora actually laughed again.  
“Wha-? I could be!” Stiles said indignantly. 

“Not dressed like that.” The Sheriff dead-panned.

This statement even made Derek chuckle, as Stiles glanced down at what he was wearing, frowning slightly. He couldn’t find anything wrong with his clothes. They were just clothes. 

“We need to have a talk.” The Sheriff said, addressing this to Laura Hale. 

He opened his mouth to continue but stopped abruptly, his eyes bulging at the sight of Peter Hale. For a few moments, the Sheriff fumbled for words. At last, he spoke.

“Did you shave your uncle’s eyebrow off?”

Laura didn’t miss the tone of incredulity. She merely flicked her hair, nodding like it was a perfectly ordinary thing to have done. The Sheriff shook his head in disbelief. He glared at Cora, Laura and Derek.

“Did you also kidnap my son?”

“You’ve got it wrong, officer. They’re…” Laura trailed off, grinning. “Well, Stiles might want to say.”

His dad turned towards him raising an eyebrow, most likely already guessing from the kiss he’d just walked in on. Stiles cleared his throat.

“Dad, this is my boyfriend, Derek Hale.”

From that point on, Stiles felt his life had become a hundred percent cooler.  
*

A week later, Peter Hale was still trying to grow back his hair and his eyebrow. Laura and Cora Hale regularly sent Stiles text messages, making sure he kept Derek in line. Apparently, Derek was the most likely to conveniently forget important calendar dates. Especially, his birthday. Stiles understood that meant Derek didn’t want a massive surprise party. He just wanted normality. Which, after the mall business and the signing of papers at the police station, was a little different. Laura had walked out of the station, chattering to Stiles about how having that on her record was absolutely worth the look on Peter’s face. Derek had merely grunted a goodbye. He was due to arrive any minute now. The door opened at exactly one o’clock. Derek’s camaro was parked outside the Stilinski drive. Derek walked inside, wearing a tight leather jacket and varying shades of black of clothes.

“What’s this?” He asked quietly, his eyes eyeing the cake shyly. 

Stiles walked over to him, looping his hands in Derek’s jean straps and pulling him closer for a peck on the lips. 

“Happy birthday.” He whispered.

He had never seen Derek Hale so happy before. That was when Derek was glad he’d stormed up to Stiles’s table because this was worth it. This was happiness on a silver platter, a person who cared for him and looked past the movie star image, a person who saw him and not only his famous relatives, a person who had a birthday cake waiting on a table. Derek leaned in to whisper back, his reply was what Stiles considered the equivalent of a love declaration from the likes of Derek.

“Thank you.”


End file.
